Ok, I don’t even know what prompted me to start a blog. But since I don’t own a diary…although I did when I was younger and it always started with the words: “Dear Diary, How are you? I am fine. Are you doing anything right now?” etc….. I actually held a conversation with ‘Diary’ who knew almost all my secrets. ANYWHO… I wrote in it everyday and have NO EARTHLY IDEA where it ended up. Probably in the hands of the enemy. Who knows.
I have only one sister who we will call, CHERI, for now, although I always suspected that I had an even older sister named Sharon. I think she was kept in the attic. Ok. This was a recurrent dream I had when I was little and I obviously will NOT know the truth until the Rapture. My mother, who will be referred to as MOM, denies such a girl existed, but I can’t trust her. I haven’t spoken about “Sharon” much because I was afraid they would knock me off and then people would be wondering if I existed also.
Family is AWESOME! Why didn’t I think this when I was younger?? Everyone has such funny traits and they don’t even know it. Cheri can imitate my mother better than my mother can imitate herself! And me? Ha! I don’t remember ANYONE!! Whenever there is a funeral (I’ve missed a lot) they will start telling me who was there and I ALWAYS say, “Who?” I don’t know. Maybe I should just smile and nod.
My memory is ridiculous. It’s not there. I hope I finish this blog, especially since it is the first one. My latest failed memory is where is the key to the gun safe? I must be the BEST hider (new word) ever because I have hidden the key and now I have absolutely no idea where it is. One day I’m imagining that I will find it and I will look at it and say, “Huh?” not remembering what it goes to and throw it away. Bless my heart.
Well, there is five, yes FIVE, children in this crazy family. I did not BEAR all five, but they have been with me for so long I feel like I did. Each one has such a great personality and is so much fun to be with. We’ll talk about them later.
Back to me. I don’t work. I don’t necessarily clean. I don’t always cook. I do work out. I do shop. There. That is who I am. Oh, I LOVE the Lord and I LOVE to go to church. It’s a place that you can go in and sit and have a WHOLE hour to yourself. It’s a time to rest and also a time to worship and I love every second of it. Although last Sunday there was a little boy about 4 rows ahead of me on the opposite side of the aisle and he turned around, picked his nose and then put that chubby, nasty little finger in his mouth ALL WHILE LOOKING STRAIGHT AT ME!! THAT is when the gagging started. I looked down and gagged. I looked away and gagged. We went through two hymns and I was still gagging. He thought this was very funny and I am not really sure what the pastor said but I’m sure it was very nice. I could only see this child, his finger and the booger and ……nevermind……i’m gagging….
I probably should go for today….I have this visual that I need to scrub out of my mind. Tomorrow we will talk about my bladder.